Wednesday: I think there's something wrong with me. I woke up excited. Excited. "To what?", you ask. To be on a liquid diet. I know it's weird, but I'm ready for everything! We've spent the last two days making 5 different homemade soups!! I have enough protein and am stoked!
That was, until about 11:30 when I got a call saying that the surgery might be postponed because they didn't think I would get authorization in time. Ugh. My options were to be on the liquid diet and hope I get approved for next Wednesday, or "enjoy" the holidays and have surgery in January. Well I can't enjoy the holidays because I am ready to lose some serious weight!! So I have chosen to have a little blind faith and be on the liquid diet and pray that I will have surgery next Wednesday after all.
/Rant/ Why are they waiting until this week to get authorization?! Why did they tell me Friday that I am missing some 3 key pieces of paperwork? I don't get it and it makes me mad, but I'm going to deal with it and do what I can. /End Rant/
You might be wondering why I need to shrink my liver. I had the same question, and the answer is that your liver is on top of your stomach. To reach the stomach (lapriscopically) they must be able to see it under the liver. Therefore, I have to shrink my liver so my stomach is easier to see. I can see it just fine, but apparently the doctors might have trouble... Haha! If the liver isn't shrunk, they will either NOT operate or open me up. So... SHRINK THAT LIVER!!
Thursday: Today was Thanksgiving and I sat at the table while people around me ate. I did pretty well once I had started eating for the day. I think I'm hypoglycemic; I get extremely grouchy and downright mean when I'm hungry. I drank lots of water and wish I could have eaten everything on the table in mass quantities. But, I didn't cheat once. Go me!! Dad was strong throughout the whole day and didn't eat anything we weren't allowed to either. We rock!
My relationship with food took a backseat to my will to be healthy today. I don't think it likes that very much. Some of my hunger was pure, raw hunger, but I'm sure some was head hunger. I am learning to tell myself no, a trait I have down with everything but food. I deny myself many things, but food is not one of them. Now I will deny myself what I do not need. Next year's Thanksgiving I will look awesome and will eat everything in small, tiny portions!! Yay!
We are practicing not drinking 30 minutes before and after meals. This is hard for me, but I am doing my best. I literally time myself so that I wait the 30 minutes after, but before is more of a guesstimation. It's hard, but worth it.
Two of the soups I made taste less than delicious. One had far too much garlic and the other tasted very plain. However, the lentil soup I made looks gross, but is pretty good! It tastes like pureed black eyed peas; with a little salt it wasn't so bad!