Day 111

Our last walk here.

Today therapy started at 10, so I thought I might sleep in a bit... WRONG!! They tried to draw blood again at 5 am, got my vitals at 6:30, breakfast at 7:30, and nurse at 8:30. That's when things got scary. She changed the dressing on my leg and thought it looked "off". Then the doctor assigned to me looked at it and was worried. That's when my dread set in. I started freaking out because I'm supposed to go home, yet here I am worrying about more stitches; I automatically think, "infection". I call and talk to Mommy, who threatens to come back up here. However, Daddy took the day off (previously; so he could be here for my last day) and headed up here shortly after that.

I eat my breakfast, cry, and wait for Dad to get here. He gets here and I'm whisked off to "independence day" for therapy. We do groups, then standing. Next, I get more wound care which scares me some more. The PT debreeds (sp) it, which is a fancy way to say clean and pick the scabs. She measures the deepness of some spots in my incision, while I try not to cry. Then she sends us on our merry way. We try to eat in the cafeteria, but I didn't like what was being served. We went back to the room and debated what to eat for lunch (while watching what I missed of Robin Hood Men In Tights when I fell asleep last night) until it was time for more therapy.

During this therapy session, I did the small and medium ramp ALL BY MYSELF THREE TIMES!! I was impressed. Next we manipulated my left arm. My PT taught my dad what to do when we get home. After that was done, it was time for walker hopping.

After all that we practiced a car transfer. Nailed it!! We went back to my room and took a nap instead of figuring out what to eat. Then, my favorite PT came to visit me!! We talked about all sorts of stuff. The case worker came next to talk about discharge for TOMORROW. She found me some support groups and a cool thing where I can help kids and teens that are amputees! I'm excited for that!! My ortho showed up next to look at my incision. He said it looked ok and that he would come back tomorrow to make the every-other-day wound care work out correctly. Most importantly, he said it looked ok. A sigh of relief escapes and a sense of calm came over all of us. He is going to put me on some antibiotics to be safe; I'm ok with that.

Mommy showed up mid ortho visit. We finally decided on BBQ. We ordered and ate a HUGE amount of delicious food. I told Dad we should take one last walk, so we did. After we got back to the room, he went home. Now I'm off to Lala Land for the last time here (hopefully).

And that's life...

Day 110

My Nonnie sent me this; I needed it and will need it in the future.

I started out the day with my favorite nurse visiting me after her 12 hour shift! It was awesome!! However, I started out therapy a little slow and apathetic. I think I might not have slept well last night. I was just in a funk. You know those days where you wake up and don't want to go to work, but know you can't call in? That's how I felt with therapy. Meh. I got through it. I walker hopped a total of 30 feet (12 and then 18 feet)!! That's an improvement. I stood for about 3 minutes, and then 3 minutes after that. Also an improvement.

Let me just say that phantom pains SUUUUUUUCK!! I feel like someone has a voodoo doll of me and pokes it when they feel like it. To be clear, I do NOT believe in voodoo. Ha! Anyways, I do hope it goes away eventually. Apparently it could go either way. I'm of course hoping for the pains to go. It's not a constant pain, just random shooting pains. That's REAL fun...

So I was humbled today by a story on Mama Laughlin's blog. I hope I can be of some service. All of the stories are heartbreaking, but one in specific just jumped out at me and I felt the need to help. So, hopefully I'll get to.

I was flipping through channels and found that AMC is playing Robin Hood Men In Tights. This is one of my favorite movies!! The sarcasm slays me, and the references crack me up! Hahaha!

And that's life...

Day 109

Today's therapy went well. I worked really hard (even when my therapist wasn't there for a bit). While working on the arm bike, twice, I rocked out to my awesome playlist. I'm pretty sure people thought I was crazy. Ha! During group another amputee said she was going to work harder because she saw me working hard. I was really touched. I just work hard for me.

We practiced using the walker again. I really don't like it. For one, I have to hop and big girls should NOT hop... Second, I don't think it's an efficient way to ambulate or walk. Third, it makes me tired so fast. We shall see.

I put up my OWN hair today... TWICE!! I am so proud of me. I put it up this mornimg and after my shower this evening. It wasn't easy and it's not perfect, but I'll take it!

I did my own hurrr.

Today I was reading a different blog. It made me cry because of how kind people can be. It also reminded me that my situation isn't as bad as some peoples'. Mama Laughlin is running (haha if you know her) a Christmas special thing. She is posting stories of less fortunate people and is allowing others to help them. It's such a beautiful thing to see. I hope you take a look and help if you can.

P.S. Phantom pain sucks!
And that's life...

Day 108

Today was assessment day. My case worker came to talk to Mom and me. She told me that the doctor, PT, and OT had decided that I should stay until next Wednesday. I think they said this because assessment day is Tuesday so that gives them until at least then to evaluate me. We asked her what my goals were. She explained them to us, we asked questions, and then we bargained with her and she is going to let me go home on SATURDAY!!!!

I'm so excited! I get to go home on Saturday!! To sleep in MY bed! See MY clothes in the closet! Watch MY, well Dad's, TV! Shower in MY shower! I. Can. NOT. Wait.

Today in PT I went up the small ramp four times. Then... on the fourth try, I went up the NEXT ramp!!! I also used the platform walker and got one foot... Five feet... TEN feet!! Yeah, I'm awesome!! I also did the arm bike, group, and made a candy cane and an ornament. I'd say it was a productive day.

The "small" ramp is on the left with the red, and the "medium ramp has the bars.

The guy came with my stump protector, but it didn't exactly fit right. So he took it back and will fix it. Since my shrinker keeps roiling down (creating a sort of tourniquet), he told me not to wear it, and he is ordering me a new, different one. My beautiful, amazing PT came to visit me today!! We talked for a while about everything. My ortho surgeon came to visit me also. He checked my sutures, because of course I'm so scared I'm going to get another bacteria infection.We also chatted a while about a little bit of everything.

Random paragraph: My spirits have been lifted quite a bit because of this. Also, they took my brace off my leg and I can bend my knee. They took me off Lovenox and put me on some pill; no more belly shots!! They changed out my mattress because the other one went up on both sides... It was weird. I miss it. Ha!

I'm going to talk a bit about phantom pains. Now, I don't take pain meds, except Tylenol (I don't like to take things I don't have to). The pains are not all the time; they're random. It kind of feels like someone has some electric machine attached to different random points on the bottom of my foot and just turn up the voltage every once in a while in different places. Also, my toes feel cramped sometimes. I try to tell myself I don't have those toes (that rhymes!); it doesn't work. I sometimes feel my leg tingle. I get random sharp pains all up and down my leg. My arch will cramp up like I've over-extended it. I can even feel the hole that was in my ankle, even though it didn't really hurt when I had it. It's usually short lived, but has brought me to tears. I try to move my other leg/toes to fix the problem; sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. It excruciating sometimes and annoying always, but it's something I'll have to learn to deal with.

And that's life...

Day 107- A day of WORK

Remember. Remember. Remember.

Today I worked SUPER hard in PT and OT. Not only for me so I'll get stronger, but because assessment day is tomorrow and I hope they will release me. I'm real nervous about assessment tomorrow, but Mommy is going to be here. I think I get to go to the meeting, too. That will help me feel more at ease.

Today, and sometimes everyday, I have moments of intense anger at my situation. I feel like I shouldn't even have to be doing therapy. I shouldn't have had to fight just to lose my foot. I shouldn't have to put my life on hold to get better. However, then I remember this is real life and I have to just suck it up and deal.

My grandparents stopped by and sat with me while I did OT, PT, and ate lunch in the cafeteria. Then my grandma and I played with Furby. They watched me make a wreath out of beads for some "non-excercise" after 15 minutes on the arm bike. Then we went outside to the therapy courtyard and I practiced using the ramp; I have a blister on my thumb from it. It was difficult to go up the ramp. It looked so small, but it was a lie. It was such hard work!! Heading down the hill was much easier and I did it perfectly the first time! Woot!

Daddy and I took a walk after Mommy brought us dinner (BWW YUM!!). We talked about how there might be things I need to learn here. He said I needed to at least wait until tomorrow and see what they say. He's worried we're going to get home and not be able to do something or know something because I didn't stay. My goals for PT are standing and wheel chair mobility which I can practice at home and outpatient PT. Anyways, I'm just nervous about tomorrow so I'm just going to go to bed.

Thank you again for reading. I never expected to reach so many wonderful people through my ramblings. So thank you.

And that's life...

 

Day 106- A day of rest

Today was a day of rest. I didn't have to get up at the crack of dawn, although I had to fend off a few nurses and techs. Mommy got me some breakfast, then we watched a movie (it was AMAZING!!!!), and then Daddy came! Since there was no therapy today, I kind of got to chill. After that, Mom went for lunch while Dad and I went outside for a bit. Then we got some visitors. We ate lunch and watched some True Blood.

Then a family from church came and brought us communion. It came in this cute little travel set. My sister and her boyfriend were here and partook. It was lovely!! They brought me stuff from the advent night we had and a card from DFW Bloggers! Thanks girls, I can't wait to meet y'all!!! Next we all really broke bread together by eating dinner, taco soup. After dinner, they packed up and left us to visit with each other.

My GINORMOUS card! I already had it hung up!!

So we can't focus the camera, but we got pics!

Eating in the cafeteria (not their food though...).

Today I am really struggling. I want to go home. Now. Not tomorrow. Not after evaluation day on Tuesday. Now. I guess maybe I'm worried they'll say I have to stay here forever or something, I don't know. I've already made a TON of progress and want to leave. I want to sleep in MY bed!!! I want my parents to wake up and see me, then come home to me. Not have to put their lives on hold for me. Especially for this long. Dad really wants me to wait for evaluation day. For him, I will. If they tell me I have to stay forever or something, I'm leaving. That's all there is to it.

It's not like I feel like they don't know what they're doing here, it's just that there's a lot of group therapy and not enough one on one. How can they evaluate me if they don't know what I can do? Apparently during evaluation, all the people who treat me get together and talk about my status. It better be awesome!! Ugh. I want to go home.

I took a loooong shower tonight!! It was absolutely sublime!!! Now I'm off to bed.

And that's life...

Day 105

Today we started the process for a prosthesis!! I got a shrinker; think stretchy sock that fits really tight. The shrinker is supposed to shape Stumpy McGee into a good citizen good shape for the prosthesis. These awesome guys were the ones who came out to put the shrinker on and take a mold of my stump. I'm excited because this is the first step in the process!!

This is the shrinker on Stumpy McGee!

The mold being cut off so they can work on the next step.

I had therapy for three hours this morning and wowed quite a few people! I met a lady who said she admired me for working on my elbow stuff. She has had each elbow replaced FIVE times... That's crazy!! I admire her! Ha ha! I am a little sore from therapy and can't get comfy to sleep.

Furby: there's an app for that! One of my friends sent me a Furby from Cali. I am stoked!! Thanks you so so much! This will provide sooooo much entertainment for us. We added batteries, downloaded the app, and laughed like hyenas!! That's all I'm going to say about it... Check it out.

Furby and me!

My sister and Furby sleeping!

I had a lot of visitors today. One brought cookies, one a crocheted hat, nail polish, and a whole lot of love! I enjoyed the visits and company (even if I fell asleep...). I really lpve all the visitors I get; they;re amazing!! I love you all more than you know. Thank you for reading!!

And that's life...